Confessions of a staycation lover

When it comes to the weekends, I am often counting down from Wednesday (hump day) to buzzy Fridays, filled with excitement about the fact that I am going to spend my Saturdays and Sundays staycationing in London.

London is an amazing city with so much to see and do and as much as I may feel like I deserve some down time in the weekends, I also know that it is a crime to stay indoors when there is so much happening across the city.

If you wanted to, you could live in London like a tourist – cramming your Saturdays and Sundays with market visits (Portobello, Borough, Broadway!), festivals, pop up events, museums and galleries, and more.

That is what I often did when I moved to London four years ago and I absolutely loved taking in everything the city had to offer. In fact I lived in a perpetually dreamy state for six months straight after I arrived, enamoured with the vibrancy of the city, which is always alive and brimming with possibility.

Now that I have been in London for several years and it has truly become my home I feel more comfortable with taking a more relaxed approach to my weekends.

These days most of my staycationing revolves around walking and food. This is a wonderful combination as you can indulge in delicious brunches and dinners and then erase much of the guilt by burning calories directly afterwards. You can’t go wrong!

London has every type of cuisine imaginable and countless restaurants, cafes, diners, market stalls, and more. Before I make eating plans with friends I often consult Google about the best spots in the hopes of unearthing undiscovered gems.

By the same token, as a creature of habit I also like to go back to my favourite places. There is something to be said about knowing what you are going to get and having faith in the quality of food they deliver.

When it comes to walks, I have taken to walking to my many of my destinations instead of taking public transport. London has an amazing underground train service and it has served me well over the years, but it is a real treat to walk above ground across town and take in so many of London’s most famous landmarks.

For instance, a walk from home in west London all the way to London Bridge to get pasta at a wonderful spot called Padella takes me past the Royal Albert Hall, Hyde Park, Buckingham Palace, Westminster Abbey and Southbank. I can assure you, walking past such iconic sights never gets old, no matter how many times you have done it!

So as the weekend approaches I am working out my plans, figuring out where to eat and where to walk to, and I know that by Monday I will feel as though I have had a relaxing and fun-filled staycation.

Romance in the Tinder age: the paradox of choice

I have had many conversations with my friends about the uninspiring treadmill that is the dating scene. In London it seems to be particularly atrocious though it can be hard to pinpoint exactly why this is.

London is a city with a population of over 8 million people. Reports indicate that in 2014 25% of people living in Inner London and 16% in Outer London were aged 25 to 34. What this shows is that there are a lot of young adults living in London. I don’t know exactly how many of these people are single but my guess is that the dating pool of unattached singletons should be vast. Maybe that is where the problem lies.

A couple of years ago I read a fantastic book called The Paradox Of Choice, which argues that excessive choice can paralyse our ability to make decisions and leave us less satisfied with the choices we do make.

When applied to dating it would seem that having all those young people on the dating scene doesn’t necessarily make things easier. In fact, it would suggest that the more fish there are in the sea, the harder it is to catch one.

That may be because there are plenty of other fish that catch your attention all at the same time, which creates paralysis and reluctance to stick with just the one fish. Or once a fish has been chosen there is less contentment with that choice, leaving fears that better options could be out there ready to be caught. Okay, enough with the fishing analogies!

Dating apps don’t exactly make things easier. In fact I think that they exacerbate the problem. In the past people would traditionally have met their partners through friends, or work, or some kind of social activity and the pool of people available to date would have seemed to be relatively small.

With dating apps the options appear to be limitless. On Tinder you may match with hundreds of people all living within a 5 mile radius of you. While this may seem great, for one reason or another many guys then go on to waste away most of the matches they get by sending monosyllabic messages, ignoring them or sending them a lewd message that is only hilarious in hindsight once posted to the Tinder Nightmares feed. In fairness, I am sure some women do this too (I just don’t know about them).

When dates do get arranged many have a one date mentality, which consists of going on a date and if there is no immediate connection, moving on to the next, and then the next, until you have had 20 dates with different people in a one month period.

So what is the answer? I think there is something to be said for going on a date with someone and giving them a chance if there is even a glimmer of a spark which might develop over multiple dates. First impressions may not be the best indicator of a person’s true qualities, especially when first date nerves are also involved.

What we can take from all of this is that dating in London is hard. Perhaps it is time to start giving people second (and third and fourth) dates so that you can narrow those choices down and invest more in people. Hopefully that will eventually lead you to someone you really connect with, which will save you from that nasty paradox of choice!